Last week I started a series on this blog exploring the possibilities for staying fired up about our goals and intentions.
Because we often get great ideas, and then we fizzle out.
We lose our momentum because we might be too busy with all of the responsibilities we have. By the time we take care of our requirements, we don’t have any energy left for achieving that which is important to us.
And that’s where the fizzle comes in.
Fizzling sounds like this.
“I don’t have time to do that today” or “there’s never enough time to _______ (write, exercise, meet potential clients, travel, etc.).”
“I want to, but first I need to _______ (do the laundry, make more money, lose weight before I go to the gym, etc.).”
“I think I have a good idea, but no one else will think so.”
When we fizzle we go a little limp. Our shoulders might sag a little with the weight of an idea or a dream that is continually unrealized. We may not smile as readily or as genuinely.
We might wake up in the morning and go through a series of motions, but not really engage in the work we do or the people we interact with.
We survive, but we’re just fizzling.
Fizzle can be a good place to be in. A fizzling fire is not completely out. There is still some heat and activity left just beneath the surface. That’s what we want to tap into.
Trapped beneath the layer of responsibilities, and should-do’s is a fire that’s waiting to flare up.
In this second week of exploring how we can keep moving forward in the face of exhaustion, distraction, and feelings of helplessness, I have a prompt to get you started:
Who are the people in your life you can count on for support to reach your goals?
Some common answers to this question are to name or label those closest to us. Spouses, siblings, parents, friends.
In some cases the people closest to you, the people you live with, are aware of your goals and intentions, and are on board and ready to support you.
And in other cases, they aren’t.
It’s not because they don’t care or don’t want to support you. It just might not be the nature of your relationship.
My spouse knows that I write and coach clients. And he supports that effort whole-heartedly. He listens to me when I want to talk about my efforts and he offers suggestions when I ask for input.
And as wonderful as that is, at the end of the day, he’s not a writer. Nor is he a coach. He does not own a business.
His perspective is always going to be geared toward thinking that I can do whatever I set my mind to and that he just needs to be my cheerleader.
And I love him for it. We all need people to cheer us on.
We also need peers. We need people who are in similar circumstances that we can bounce around ideas with, share resources, and ask to hold us accountable for moving forward.
We can stay fired up when we find (or start) a group where we can give and receive support.
This is huge.
Find your peeps, your buddies, your tribe, and connect with people who are trying to do the same thing, or something similar, to what you are.
If that thing you’re trying to do is go to the gym regularly, find a class you like, a workout buddy, or both.
Starting a business? Hire a coach, join your local Chamber of Commerce, or start a mastermind group.
The support and accountability that you receive from others is critical to moving forward. When a task seems daunting and like one you just don’t want to complete, it’s time for a fresh perspective, and joining a group can give you that.
How can you find like-minded people who are into the same things you are? Start with the places you already go. Colleagues, other parents, friends, people you see at the gym – these are all immediate resources you can tap into for finding what you need.
It can start with slipping into conversation that you are on the lookout for a group of women with whom you can share business ideas. Or that you are on the lookout for a book club to get a little more social time.
I did this when I was ready to go back to work as Ayla’s first birthday was approaching. When I ran into people I knew at the grocery store or discussed child care with anyone who would listen, I would throw out that I was on the lookout for someone who could watch my child and maybe one or two others in my home or another parents home. I asked all of my friends to keep their ears open and asked my husband to mention it at work too. It didn’t take too long before the right person came along to help us with our needs.
There are other ways to find what you need too. You can browse Facebook groups. Or check out meetup.com to see if you can find what you are looking for in your area.
If you can’t find a group that you can tap into, it might be time to start your own.
When we come together as a group of people with a common purpose we are tapping into the energy of the tribe. Regardless of the individual goals of the group members, you can hold each other accountable, celebrate successes, and keep each other going.
Give it a shot and see how the power of a group can fire you up instead of fizzle you out.
Like this article? Please feel free to use it on your own blog or newsletter. I simply ask that you please include this blurb:
Sara Marchessault is a coach, writer, teacher, and mom who helps busy women use journaling to create more space in their life for being productive without feeling overwhelmed. To learn more about Sara and her work in the world, please visit joyfulbydesign.com or saramarchessault.com.